My childhood

Remembering my childhood, I get a little sad. And if I was given the opportunity to go back and live all over again, I would surely refuse. Most of my childhood was spent with other people and in a boarding school for low-income children.

Up to ten years I was raised by my own mother. But since the time was hectic, we had nothing to live on. Mom could not get a job, and I watched it every day. It was difficult, but my mother decided to go to work in Moscow. She left me to my elder sister. And a year later we lost contact with my mother. We were left alone without means of subsistence and without shelter.

My sister arranged for me to a boarding school, where I grew up and was raised. She lived with her aunt and worked. My sister always took me away for the weekend, but still being a child I was hurt that my mother had disappeared and that I had been living in a boarding school for the whole week.

I'll tell you about my school, or rather about a boarding school for poor children or orphans. I'll start briefly about the school, what she is like.

Boarding school is a special educational institution for children under the age of majority, has the possibility of a 24-hour stay of students. Such educational institutions are being created with the aim of helping families in the upbringing of the younger generation, as well as raising the level of social protection of children and developing their giftedness.

The daily routine in our school was as follows: a rise of 7-00, at 7-30 - a short walk and charging on the street, at 8-00 start breakfast, at 8.30 lessons began. Somewhere in the area of ​​11-30 is the second change. Lunch is at 14-00. From at 15-00 to 16-00 is a quiet hour, then a snack. After a mid-day snack - walk an hour and a half, somewhere up to 17-45. Till 19-00 is a self-preparation (preparation of lessons for the next day) in the classroom, at 19-00 is a dinner. Then free time or continue cooking homework. At 21-00 is a retreat. On Friday the children were taken home after the lessons (if possible) and we were always particularly happy, if suddenly we were taken before lunch.

I always lacked my mom and sister. It was always a shame that other children have a home and a family, but I don’t. All were raised by my parents, and my teachers and nurses were at the boarding school. All the children were fed home delicious, homemade food, and me in the dining room, and most often barley. Now I hate barley!

Everything is as it should be in our social life. Nothing bad, whole day professional teachers with children, but still one is present. Living and being brought up in children’s home or a boarding school, children do not get enough attention and caress that could be given to them from their parents, because of the lack of parental attention and care, behavior, rudeness, emotional tension, falsity, envy, and confliction’s develop in behavior. Deviations in emotional development have already been observed for the first time in the life of a child being raised outside the family, and in adolescence these problems become more significant, since during this period the child enters a new social position. At this time, his conscious attitude towards himself, his peers, his studies, his surroundings is formed, and his life and professional self-determination develops.

 Depriving parents, the child falls into the state of "maternal deprivation." This concept includes a number of different phenomena. This is the mother's insufficient care for the child, and the temporary separation of the child from the mother, and, finally, the lack or loss of the child's love and affection for the mother - in one word, no one is unnecessary. On the basis of this feeling, the child develops an attitude toward the world, an attitude of attachment that not only for the development of future relationships - their direct influence helps reduce the feelings of anxiety that the child has in new or stressful situations. In addition, close people and mother are a source of comfort for the child in moments of despair. The lack of basic trust in the world is seen as the very first, the most difficult and most difficultly compensated consequence of maternal deprivation. It generates fear, aggressiveness, and distrust towards people and towards oneself, unwillingness to cognize the world, deprives the child of the possibility of normal mental, social and sensory development (the need for diverse impressions).

   Maternal and family deprivation leads to rejection of children from orphanages among peers. Among them, often there are conflicts, there are "school groupings", deviant behavior and the result of this is the absence of classes, vagrancy and the reduction of educational motivation.

  Children who are brought up outside the family are characterized by poverty of emotional and social experience, underdevelopment of communication, imaginative thinking and lack of self-image, self-doubt and lack of a life perspective, which leads to emotional deprivation. The child receives his first emotional experience in the family, and if this family is unsuccessful, and parents are among the persons with deviant behavior or the family is not at all, then this experience simply can’t be.

No matter how hard the teacher and educator of this boarding school tried for us, it always seemed to us that they were the worst enemies who want to get rid of us as soon as possible. At the slightest conflict, the child's soul rushed and searched for his mother, whom he could see only on Friday evening, if she still came for him. In this situation, I do not know what is good or bad. But one thing is clear: nothing can replace parental attention and love.