Japanese family

The Japanese family has undergone many changes in the history of the development of civilization. So some sources say that before the Meiji era, Japanese women chose their own husband. In other words, when it came to marriage, the initiative always came from a woman. The man could, of course, refuse, but no more than three times. In the Meiji era, such a custom was officially abolished, but, nevertheless, in some regions of the Land of the Rising Sun, the tradition of choosing a groom remained until World War II.

However, in the upper classes of Japan, everything happened slightly differently. The marriage was concluded by means of watches - miai. The groom's parents chose the bride and sent their matchmaker - nakoodo - to her family.

About 30% of Japanese families are formed due to this ancient tradition. True, this happens mainly in families of aristocrats who respect their family and respect traditions. In the modern rite of the miai, both the groom and the bride take part. Without their mutual consent, marriage is impossible. The roles of nakoodo (matchmakers) are now taken over by special companies that help to find customers the ideal companions of life and organize dinner-watches in a restaurant.

Since ancient times, 3-4 generations of the family lived in a Japanese house under one roof at once. Grandparents, great-grandparents and great-grandparents lived with their children and grandchildren. The oldest man in this house, as a rule, was the head, and everyone else obeyed him. Until 1947, a woman in Japan and a Japanese family had practically no rights. It was only after the adoption of the new constitution that equal rights between men and women were proclaimed, and the principles of equal inheritance between children and free choice of career and spouse were introduced. In Japan extended family.

Now grandparents rarely live in the same family as young ones. Especially when it comes to big cities and small Japanese apartments. Increasingly, elderly parents live either in a separate apartment or house, or in a special nursing home. The fact is that in a modern Japanese family, both spouses are often busy all day: and they simply do not have the opportunity to look after elderly parents. And if old people have health problems and need care and supervision, then the Nursing Home becomes the most acceptable solution. Moreover, many institutions of this plan allow you to bring grandparents to the day: this is a kindergarten for the elderly. Here they will be looked after, here they will be fed and entertained. In the end, grandparents can communicate with their peers here. In the evening, they are taken home by children.

If we talk about a typical Japanese dad and a typical Japanese mother, we can describe them in a nutshell as follows: a typical Japanese dad works a lot, gets tired a lot and sees his children and wife actually only on weekends; a typical Japanese mother fills the Japanese house with comfort and warmth, she cooks, cleans, sews, raises children and solves all other household problems, thereby creating the atmosphere necessary for the comfortable return home of her spouse and other household members.

Often, if both spouses work in the family, then the children are brought up late enough or not at all.

In Japan, a child under 5 is a king, and after - a servant. It is. Traditionally, in Japan, a child under 5 years old is allowed everything. They never say no to him, they don't yell at him, they don't forbid him anything, they don't punish him for hooliganism. He's a deity. This does not mean that in Japan someone else's child can sit on your head. It is believed that mother is responsible for the actions of her child, so the task of Japanese mommy is to create all the conditions so that her carapace does not cause trouble. She should not direct the child with screams and prohibitions, but with skillful actions. In the end, it is small Japanese from childhood who are instilled in such a concept as social shame. There is nothing worse than being rejected by society. Japanese mothers teach their babies exactly that.

And at the age of 5, the child, going to school, gradually plunges into the atmosphere of prohibitions, restrictions and strict rules that all Japanese society lives with. Now his situation in the family is changing. He is no longer a king or a deity, but an assistant. But this is a completely different story.

The Japanese family is striking with its identity.